


Seasons Change

by StormyBear30



Category: Queer as Folk (UK)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-10-09
Updated: 2011-10-09
Packaged: 2017-10-24 10:36:00
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 12,106
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/262522
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/StormyBear30/pseuds/StormyBear30
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's the Christmas holiday so why isn't anyone happy?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Seasons Change

Hazel wants us to all meet up at hers around ten o'clock Christmas morning" I said to Stuart as he was driving me to work early one morning. "She figures that it will give you enough time to kick out whatever shag you've have the night before…before getting ready" I laughed off my lame attempt at a joke because no matter how much I tried to deny it…I was still arse over elbow in love with him. "Stuart…you ok?" I asked when he didn't even give me a glance as he continued to drive in complete silence. "Stuart?" It was at that moment that the fear began to consume me because as we finally pulled up in front of Harlo's and he truly did look at me…I could see something that I had never seen before…desperate fear. "Stuart…" I said again…reaching out to touch him in a sense of comfort…but he only pushed my hand away before looking back out the window.

"I won't be going to Hazel's for Christmas" He spoke tersely…still staring out the window ahead of him.

"What…we always have Christmas at Hazel's together" I stammered…shocked and more then a bit hurt that he was breaking our long standing tradition. "Stuart…what is this all about?" I questioned…knowing that I was pushing him to far at the clench of his jaw as he turned to face me.

"You're not my boyfriend Vince. You're not my lover. You're just some sad bastard that I allowed the privilege to be my friend" his words were cold and heartless and although Stuart could always be out right nasty to me…that day he took it to a whole new level. "I don't have to account for my time with you. I said that I will not be going to Hazel's for Christmas and that's all you need to know about that. Now get the fuck out"

"Right…" I replied sadly…fighting like hell to control the tears that quickly wanted to consume me. I watched as he drove off…leaving me on the curbside confused and wondering what the hell was going on with him. The truth of the matter was that Stuart had been acting quite strange for a few days prior to that incident. I didn't know what was bothering him and each time that I asked him about it he would nearly cut my head off. However he was my friend and I was arse over elbow in love with him so I had to try and pretend that it didn't hurt that he was keeping something from me. I was in such a mood all day that when the end of the day finally arrived I couldn't get out of there fast enough. Stuart was supposed to have picked me up after my shift…but as expected he was nowhere to be found. Needing to clear my head I opted to walk home…more confused and upset when he didn't return any of my phone calls and was no where to be found later that night. In fact I didn't hear from Stuart for three whole days after that morning and I was near out my mind.

"Hello…Stuart?" I screamed into the phone in the middle of the night after the third day of not hearing a word from him.

"Come over to mines" he said roughly…acting as if nothing had been going on. "I need you" Before I even had a chance to speak a bloody word the line went dead as I stared at the phone held within my hand. I kept telling myself that I wasn't going to go…that I was going to make him suffer the way that he had made me suffer for those few days…but being the bleeding dolt that I am I said this as I was dressing before rushing out the door.

"What the fuck took you so long?" he questioned me madly as I stood in the doorway panting and gasping for breath after literally running the whole way there.

"Jesus Stuart…I ran here as fast as I could. If you needed me so bloody badly maybe you should have came and picked me up with the jeep" I piped up…walking past him as I made my way into his kitchen in search of some much needed water.

"Or I could have run you over with the fucking thing" I heard him murmur as he slammed the door behind him…walking into the kitchen as he grabbed a glass of something off of the counter before walking away from me

"Ok…out with it. What is your fucking problem" I questioned fearful at what his response might be as I laid my hand upon his arm.

"I don't have a fucking problem" he bit back…grabbing my hand as he tore it off of his body as if my touch had burned him. "Just have sad bastards for friends who can't be there for me when I need them"

"Sad bastards" I sputtered…trying to get over the fact that he had the nerve to say such shit to me after just up and disappearing for three days. "You have some nerve saying this rubbish to me" I spoke up…standing up for myself in a rare moment. "You've been the one that just fucking vanished without a trace for three days. You had me worried sick about you and…"

"Fuck off then Vince" he cut me off…finally walking away from me as he went into his bedroom.

"Right…" I replied…anger…shock and hurt mixed into one as I raced for the door.

"Vince wait…" I heard him call out as he ran over to me…grabbing me by the arm as I was turned to face him. "Vince…please don't leave me" he begged as he pulled me into his arms…brutally crushing me to his body. I didn't know what was going on with him…but as he continued to hold me against his trembling body I knew that it was something that was going to be earth shattering and major once he found the courage speak of it. "Just don't leave me…don't ever leave me" his voice hitched against my ear as one hand wove its way upwards to cup my face…turning it towards his parted lips before snogging the shit out of me. I wanted to fight him…wanted to push him away…but who was I kidding…it was Stuart and I craved for such moments.

Before I knew what was happening we were in his room and I was spread out across his bed with him lying on top of me. My head was unfocused and unclear as he continued to kiss me in a way that he had never kissed me before. I knew for certain that Stuart and I were going to shag that night…but what I didn't know was what had brought on his sudden change of heart. For years prior he had been practically fanatical in his vow to never shag me because in his eyes friends could never shag their friends without fucking up the friendship in the process. I know that I should have been happy that he felt so highly about me and the friendship that I had to offer him…but at the same time it also made me heart breakingly sad.

"Vince…" I heard him cry out…jerking me from my thoughts as he straddled my waist. Within seconds he had tugged my shirt from off of my body before diving in to pay attention to my jutted nipples. Simple caresses with a tongue so glorious soon had me crying out in utter abandonment…but when teeth and tugging were adding to the mix I almost lost control. Who knew that one could feel such pleasure from something so small and simple and yet as he continued to torture me I felt as if I was about to explode. "Do you like that Vince?" I heard him question me with such lust dripping from his voice that it caused my dick to twitch before I could respond verbally.

"Yeah…course" I stammered like a dolt as he bit fist the one nipple and then the other before licking a trail up and down my chest and stomach. "Fuck…Stuart" I cried out as he nipped playfully at my navel…dipping his tongue into it for good measure.

"Oh that will happen" he teased…once again straddling my hips as he traced his tongue across my swollen lips. "But first I am going to take care of the stonker of a willy you got down there Vince"

My breath caught in my throat as he…like a seasoned pro yanked my trousers from off of my body…throwing them over his shoulder before leaning down and devouring me into his mouth. "Bleeding Christ" I cried out…arching up into his mouth because truth be told I had no bloody control over it. I can still remember everything about that moment. I remember the heated wetness of his mouth as it soaked into my penis urging it onward and upward. I remember the feel of his not to perfect teeth as they grazed over my fully sensitive tip…causing me to wail like a banshee at the sensations that blasted through me. I was so close…but I didn't want it to end as I forced myself to think about other things…anything else to make our first and possibly last time together last as long as possible. He had as always had other ideas as he roughly flipped me over onto my stomach…diving face first into my arse crack. I lost it at the very moment as I coated the duvet under me…mixing it across my skin as he continued to rim me silly.

"I'm going to fuck you Vince. I'm going to fuck you long and hard so that you never forget this night…ever" I heard him growl against my ear once he had finished his task. Like I was going to forget anything about that night…and despite the fact that those words frightened me somewhat…I couldn't concentrate on them for long as he inserted a long finger into my bum hole. "On your knees Vince" he spoke…running his free hand across my side as he assisted me up off of the duvet. Leaning back…I had to close my eyes as my back came into contact with his heated skin. Chucking softly…I couldn't help but wonder when it was that he had shed his kit and protected him self without me even seeing. I didn't wonder for long as he inserted his hard on into my hole…gripping both arms across my chest as we both cried out together in sheer pleasure. He shagged me long and hard that night. I had never been with anyone who could fuck like Stuart as he lived up to his long held title of grand shagger of Canal Street. I came a second time that night as he continued to fuck me madly. He came moments later…falling atop me as we both crashed to the bed. I was right knackered as I tried to stay coherent enough to speak…but it was a lost cause as I started drifting off to sleep. "Vince…" I heard him whisper softly as I once again tried to fight off sleep. "Don't ever leave me. Please…don't ever leave me…no matter what" were the last words I heard as I fell into a deep slumber.

I woke up the next morning with a smile across my face as I reached across the bed in hopes of a cuddle with Stuart for a few more minutes before dealing with the real world. I was quickly disappointed as I came up empty handed with no Stuart in sight. "Stuart" I called out…hoping that he was just in the loo and planning on coming back to bed…but I was once again disappointed when I didn't find him there. Dressing quickly I trudged into the next room…finding him sitting on the couch with a coffee in his hand. "Morning…" I replied with a smile as I sat down next to him…leaning over to give him a rightful kiss.

"Yeah…morning" he replied…turning his face as my lips brushed his cheek instead before he got up and walked away from me. "Um…" he stammered…turning to face me as he bit at his lower lip. I knew that I was in for something…but I couldn't help but notice just how cute he looked at that very moment as he did that.

"You ok?" I asked fearfully as he began to pace nervously before me. I knew that signal well for it had been something he had done when he was agitated since we were kids.

"You need to go" he said blatantly…taking a sip of his coffee.

"Huh" was the only response I could come up with as I tried to come to terms with the fact that after all those years of waiting for Stuart to shag me and getting what I wanted…he was tossing me out like one of his old shags.

"Get out…get out…get the fuck out Vince" he screamed in response to my brilliant retort as he put down his cup before he grabbed my by the arm and jerked me upwards. "I don't' want you here anymore"

"Vince…stop your scaring me" I cried out…trying like hell to remove my arm from his grasp. "Look…I know that you're scared about what happened…but it's ok. It's more then ok…it's brilliant"

"It's brilliant huh?" he repeated with a look so evil upon his craggy face that it sent shivers down my spine. "I waited for the out lash that I knew was to come…but not before he grabbed both sides of my face snogging the shit out of me until I was dizzy and once again unfocused. "You think that last night meant anything to me?" he questioned me as I tried to get my bearings around me. "You were just another shag to me and if you thought otherwise then you really are the sad bastard that I always said you were"

"Stuart…don't do this…please" I begged…tears forming in my eyes…but I didn't care. My world was crushing at me feet and it was crashing fast. "Just listen to me…"

"No…you bloody well listen to me" he cut me off…once again pushing me towards the door. "Last night meant nothing to me…you mean nothing to me. I want you out…out of my flat…out of my life" My world was spinning out of control as he opened the door…shoving me into the wall behind it. "I've had you…now fuck off "

"Stuart no" I screamed at the top of my lungs as I lunged forward…only to have the door hit me in the face as he slammed it shut. "Stuart" I screamed again…banging my fists on the hardness…ignoring the pain that blazed up my arms with each impact. "Stuart…don't do this to me. STUART…."

"Get the fuck out of here before I call the police on you" I heard him scream through that same door. "It's over Vince…so just fuck off" I could hear the certainty in his voice and I knew at that very moment that things between Stuart and I were over for good. We had finally fucked after all those years of waiting and as much as I had hoped that it would change our relationship for the better…it only served to end it forever.

It had been a few days since my world has ended and I was more confused and lost then I had ever been before. I had replayed that night over and over in my head a million times and I still had no idea what the fuck had gone wrong. I worried that maybe I wasn't a good enough shag compared to his others…that maybe he was sickened by the idea of fucking me again. I thought that maybe he was concerned that I was going to try and push him into being my boyfriend…no matter how very much I wanted that to come true. I went over all the possibilities…but I got the true answer from the only person that knew Stuart as well as I did…Sandra.

"Hey Vince…" she greeted me sadly as I opened the door to my flat and found her standing there with a box in her hand. "How you holding up love?" she asked…but I could tell by the look on her face that she knew I wasn't fairing well at all. "Well anyway…Stuart asked me to bring this over to you. I'll just leave it over here" she went on when I didn't answer her. "Take care of your self Vince" With that said she attempted to take her leave…but I had to know one thing.

"How is he?" I spoke barely above a whisper out of fear that my voice would crack…mirroring the crack through my heart.

She didn't say anything for such a long time that I half expected her to just leave without speaking. "He's not good Vince…not good at all" she finally spoke…setting my heart plummeting into my stomach. "Oh bloody hell…I told him that I was going to crack…that I wasn't the right person to do this…but he insisted that it be me. I don't do well when people are sick and…"

"Sandra focus" I cried out…grabbing her forcefully by the arms in order to make her stop running off at the mouth. "Is Stuart sick? Where is he? What the fuck is going on?" I threw many questions out at her as she continued to stand all wonky before me. "What the fuck is going on?"

"It's cancer Vince…Stuart has cancer" Everything just came to a stand still as I fell onto the nearby sofa…trying like hell to come to terms with what Sandra had just told me. "He was diagnosed months ago…just never told you he did. I told him that he should have told you Vince…that I did…but he told me to fuck off. It's in his bits and pieces…testicular cancer I think"

"Cancer…" I repeated in utter shock and fear…placing my hand over my mouth to control the scream that was threatening to expel from my very soul. Cancer…my greatest and oldest living fear. The one thing that I expected to grow deep within me as it ate away my very breath. It was supposed to be me was all I kept thinking about. Me...and not the greatest love of my life. "Where is he?" I asked…jumping off the sofa before once again grabbing her by the arms in order to prove the importance of my question.

"I can't tell you Vince…Stuart will fire me and…"

"You bloody well better tell me where the fuck he is or you will have to deal with more then being fired" I screamed in her face…ready to snap her neck as she continued to stand there looking at me as if I had gone daft. "Sandra…please" I switched tables…softening my tone as once again tears began to bombard me. "He needs me and I need to be there for him"

"He's at hospital in London…" she replied…her own tears rolling down her face. "Checked in today for surgery tomorrow"

"I need to get to him…thanks Sandra" I screamed over my shoulder as I raced out the door…only to turn around once I reached outside and realized I had no bloody way to get there.

"Vince…" I heard Sandra call out behind me…throwing a set of keys at me. "I'll take a taxi. Just make sure to take care of my Bitsy" she warned…throwing her arms around me as he kissed me quickly upon my cheek. "No go and take care of that man of yours"

"Thanks Sandra…" I whispered through my tears as I hugged her once again before leaving her standing on the corner.

I don't know how I did it…but I made it to London in no time flat…disheveled and knackered beyond belief. "Can I help you" a lady sitting behind a desk asked me as I entered the hospital.

"I'm looking for Stuart Jones" I replied shyly…my eyes darting along the corridors in search of any sign of Stuart.

"Ah yes Mr. Jones" she said in a way that caused me to smile internally because it was a look that most people who first have to deal with Stuart carry upon their face. "Suite 234 and you are?" she asked…eyeing me suspiciously.

"Vincent Tyler…" was my dodgy response.

"Have a nice day Mr. Tyler" She said and before she had a chance to say anything else I bid her good day and went in search of Stuarts room. My heart was beating so fast within my chest that I just knew that I was going to end up cold upon the floor. My hands were shaking…my stomach knotted as I stood outside of his room…preparing myself for the storm that I knew was to come. Taking a few deep breaths…I entered the room. Our eyes locked the moment that I had and as expected Stuart put on quite a show.

"No no no no…" He cried out…pushing the person attending him away. "What the fuck are you doing here?" his cries only got louder as he attempted to get up out of the bed…only to have the nurse push him back down again…with a few not so pleasant words to go along with it. "Get the fuck out of here Vince"

"The fuck I will you sad bastard" I cried out…making my way deeper into the room no longer frightened…but rather brassed off. "I drove all the way from Manchester to be with you and I am not leaving" I crossed my arms over my chest as if daring him to say another word and in true Stuart form he did just that.

"Get the fuck out Vince or I will have them throw you out" he went on shooting looks that were supposed to be hurtful my way…but I could see the fear and concern in his eyes. "Get him out of here" Stuart screamed at the nurse still going on about her business. "Get him the fuck out of here or I will have your fucking job" his cries got louder.

"You watch your bloody mouth Mr. Jones" the nurse warned…shutting Stuart up in an instant before turning to me. "You better leave love…don't want to upset his highness more then he already is" I could hear the teasing in her voice and it caused me to laugh despite the horrible situation.

"He's bloody well lucky that I don't kill him before the cancer has a go at him" I bit out cheekily…but with enough edge to get my point across to the man gaping across the room from me.

"I like him…he can stay" the nurse laughed…patting me on the back as she exited the room…leaving us alone.

"I should bloody kill you Stuart" I repeated…walking over towards his bedside as he turned his eyes towards the window…pretending to ignore me. "You should have told me about this so I could have been there for you. You shouldn't have kept it to yourself" my anger…tears and fear got the best of me as I fell into a nearby chair…my voice cracking despite my best efforts of trying to keep it together. "I shouldn't have had to find out from your fucking secretary that you had cancer. OMG…cancer Stuart…cancer" I finally gave up the fight as hot tears bled from my eyes. "I can't lose you Stuart…I just can't. I know that I should be strong for you…but I don't know what I will do if you leave me"

"Hey Vince…I'm not going anywhere" he spoke softly…his voice breaking as well as he reached over and took my hand into his own. "You think that I don't know that you wouldn't survive without me you life you sad bastard" he chuckled slightly…tugging my hand towards him as he nodded for me to join him in the small hospital bed.

"I can't…people will see" I sniffled.

"Get in here you bloody twat before I kick your arse" He grinned at me…his fear still so readable within blue eyes. How could I turn him down when he was trying so hard to be brave for my sake. He wrapped his arms tightly around me the moment that I laid at his side as I buried my head within the crease of his neck. It was right then and there as he held onto me that I fell completely apart and despite the fact that he was still trying to put on such a brave front…Stuart did as well. "I'm really frightened Vince" I heard him speak a little while later as we continued to lie in each other's arms. "What's am I to become once I am less of a man"

"What?" I questioned…removing my head from here it was nestled as I stared into piercing blue eyes full of such fear that it took my breath away. "Is that all you think there is to you…your dick" I asked…getting my answer as he pushed me away and sat up. "Jesus Stuart…there is so much more to you then that" I continued…laying my hand upon his cheek as I forced him to face me once again. "You're an amazing man. Your successful and loaded" I grinned…tracing my finger along the curve of his chin. "Sure…you have your faults…but for the most part you are bloody brilliant. The fact that you are losing a testicle has nothing to do with the real man that is Stuart Allen Jones. I've seen that man and I know that he exists…even if you try to bury him under all your bullshit" I could see the tears in his eyes as my words settled over him and it made me smile knowing that I was bringing him some sort of comfort at least. "I love that man" I whispered shyly…ducking my head as to avoid the look of pity that I was sure to receive from him.

"You are the only one that ever has" he spoke in an equal whisper…his voice once again cracking as before.

"That's not true Stuart and you know that. Your family…"

"My family doesn't give a shit about me…they never really have. You Vince…you alone have been the only one to ever love me for me…despite all the shitty things I have done to you. How can you love me Vince? How can you love a man who can only offer you pain and suffering. I have nothing to offer you…not even sex…the only thing I have ever truly been good at" I was truly gobsmacked as to how little Stuart thought of himself and it made me quite sad.

"Jesus Stuart…you've more to offer then a glorious fuck with a beautiful dick" I went on…grasping his chin within my grip as I forced him to listen closely to my words. "You've been there for me ever since we was kids. You've protected me from the bullies that always wanted to beat up the fag. You took care of me when I lost my virginity and was afraid that I got sick when I didn't use protection. You were the one to take me to hospital…the one who held my hand the entire time. You were the one who was there for me the three days that I was worried with sickenss as we waited for the results. You've been there for every important event in my life…holding me together sometimes…allowing me to fall apart others. You've always been there for me Stuart…always"

"You make me sound like a fucking Prince…when we both know that is nothing like the truth" he spat out…once again pulling away from me.

"No…you can be a fucking wanker most times…but if you look past the pissy words and the hateful looks you can see the bloody brilliant man that you are. No one else might be able to see him…since you try so hard to hide him…but I've seen him and I know that he exists"

"Vince…you got to know something before surgery tomorrow" I heard him say as he turned back to face me…tears shimmering down his face. "I…"

"No…don't you dare say that now. I won't let you say goodbye Stuart. I want you to say those words to me after your surgery and you're in your clear head. I want you to make sure that you mean them and not that your frightened and willing to settle for me since you think you can't get anyone else. I may be a sad bastard when it comes to you Stuart…but I won't allow you to settle for second best" I chuckled sadly…leaning forward as I kissed him softly upon frowning lips.

"You bloody well listen to me Vincent Tyler" he cried out…stunning me as he grabbed onto both sides of my face and pulled me forward until we were eye to eye. "You have never been second best to me. You are the most important person in my life…you always have been and you always will be. I love you…you hear me. I love you. I've loved you for years now but was too much of a bloody coward to admit it. I'm just sorry that it took this to give me the courage to tell you" I couldn't help the tears that once again ran down my face as his words blasted straight into my heart.

"I love you too" was my whispered reply as I closed my eyes and savored the moment.

"I just don't know what I can offer you after this" he spoke up…forcing me to end my moment of purity. "What if I can't be the man that you need me to be? I don't want to disappoint you Vince because it is something that I have been doing since we were kids" I could hear the fear and the truth in his voice and it nearly killed me to know that he was scared and hurting as much as he was.

"You could never disappoint me Stuart" I tried to assure…but in true Stuart fashion he pushed me away and became distant once again.

"You don't know that. You don't know anything Vince. The chemotherapy is intense and will be rough on the body. I will lose my hair…my sex drive. I'll be a vomiting mess with no energy left to do much of anything…much less having to worry about being the perfect man for you. Get out of here Vince. Get out while you still can and leave me be. Go and find some bloke that can be what you need him to be…because I can't be that man. I never could be"

"You can push me away all you want Stuart" I said with a slight smile of amusement upon my face. "But I won't be leaving you. I love you…and you love me and you can't take it back. It's out there in the open now. I have news for you Stuart…because you are far from perfect…but I don't care. I will love you when you lose your hair. I will love you when you lose you sex drive…because there is far more to you then just sex. I will even love you when you are a vomiting mess with no energy to feed me the bullshit you've been feeding me since we was kids. It's over Stuart…you can't push me away anymore. I won't let you"

"I want you Vince. I…I need you"

"OMG…I want you too…but we can't" I chuckled…glad that the intenseness of the moment was over and that Stuart seemed to be accepting of our fate. "If that nurse were to walk in she'd fall down dead from shock to see you shagging me"

"Who said that I would be shagging you" he teased…grinning that perfectly lopsided grin that I loved so well. "There's a perfectly good water closet over there that not being used. What do you say?" before I had a chance to respond he had his tongue down my throat as he kissed me senseless. Next thing I knew we were in the loo as he placed a packet of lube and a condom in my hand. Turning the lock…he began to kiss me as piece by piece we shed our clothing. It was a quick and speedy go…but as I entered him from behind we lost all track of time for the moment. Our cries of pleasure were muffled and hushed as we fought to not alert anyone else as to what we were doing…however our solace came to an end at an insistent banging upon the door.

"Mr. Jones are you ok in there?" we heard the nurse cry out from behind the wooden door.

"Bloody amazing" he cried out as I thrust deep within him…hitting his prostrate with just the right amount of force.

"Mr. Jones…Mr. Jones" the nurse attendant cried out again as another moan of pleasure escaped from his throat. "Do you need assistance?"

"Bleeding hell" he cried out as I continued with my thrusting action…reaching around to grab onto his rigid dick and giving it a few wanks. "Fuck…fuck…fuck" his cries got louder as my actions increased before he exploded his load all over my hand and the wall before him. I was next to come as I exploded deep within his ass…biting his shoulder and drawing blood as I filled the condom to capacity. The banging persisted as we dressed quietly with knowing smiles upon our faces. "I love you" he giggled with a wink as he slipped out the door…kissing the nurse upon the cheek before crawling back into bed.

"I don't even want to know" I heard her laugh as I stood in the middle of the small room…hiding the full condom behind my back. "It's time for you to go…visiting hours are over. You can come back in the morning before surgery" I couldn't only nod as I continued to hide the condom…blushing like a raving loon. "I'll give you a few minutes to say goodbye" Flushing the condom…I peeked out the door to make sure that she was gone before walking over to a grinning Stuart.

"OMG…that was so embarrassing" I blushed even more as I stood at the side of his bed.

"You better go" he grinned even more as he took my hand into his. "Or I will have to ravish you right here on this bed"

"Stuart behave" I grinned back…leaning over to kiss him quickly before I took my leave. "I'll see you tomorrow. Love you"

"Oy…Vince were are you staying?" he asked as I made my way towards the exit.

"Don't know…didn't stop to think about much of anything but getting here once Sandra told me" I replied truthfully…not knowing what the hell I was going to do.

"Hold on a tick" He said as he reached into a drawer beside his bed and pulled out his mobile phone. "Sandra…you are so fired that you are re-hired" I heard him speak in mock gruffness to the women who had let me in on his secret. "Take this down…and make it snappy. I need you to book Vince into a hotel…a fancy hotel. I suppose you didn't bring any clothes with you as well?" he asked…covering the mouthpiece with his hand…snorting as I blushed even more in response. "Tell the concierge that Vince needs a few new outfits as well and everything and anything that he needs is to be charged to my account. You got that? Fine…I'll wait. It was only a few minutes before Stuart had me booked and ready for the night. "Ok…oh and Sandra…thanks for everything. I'll make it up to you in the end…I promise" and with that said he ended the call. "You get out of here so I can get my beauty rest" he pointed towards the door…before lying back against the pillows behind him. "Vince…"

"Yeah…" I said…turning to face him from the door.

"Promise that you'll be back in the morning" I could once again hear the fear in his voice as I made my way back over to him…kissing him soundly upon his lips.

"I promise…"

I hated leaving Stuart…but truth be told I was near exhausted as I made my way into the hotel that Sandra has booked for me. Once I had settled into my room I found some new clothes laid across the bed along with some new undergarments. Pushing them aside…I laid on the large and empty bed…pulling my cell phone out of my pocket before calling my mother. Needless to say…but she was not happy about the fact that I just left Manchester without so much as a word to her…but as I told her about Stuart and what he was going through she calmed down some. I didn't talk to her for long…but before I bid her goodnight several arrangements were made. I couldn't sleep…not at first as the events of the day played over and over in my head. I was a mixed up mess of emotions as I tried to accept the fact that things had shifted drastically between Stuart and I. I didn't know where we were about to head off to after the surgery and that thought alone frightened me more then anything. Pushing my confused emotions aside I then focused my thoughts upon Stuart as I once again began to worry about him. It was as if he could read my thoughts as my mobile phone rang from the dresser by the bedside.

"Go to sleep already" I heard him speak with a smile in his voice.

"What…how did you…" I stammered.

"Oy Vince…I've known you for over fifteen years now. You don't think I know you like a well-read book. I know that you are replying everything over in that head of yours. It's real Vince and nothing can change that now…you tosser" His laughter was music to my ears as I finally gave into tiredness with a full yawn. "Now…get some sleep and I will see you bright and early in the morning"

"Don't think that I don't know you either Stuart Allen Jones" I chuckled slightly…already knowing the true meaning of his call. "I told you that I would be there tomorrow morning…and you of all people should know that I never go back on a promise. Now fuck off" With a full out laugh shared between the two of us we ended our call as I fell into a deep and dreamless sleep.

"Morning…" I nodded over at the nurse's station as I made my way towards Stuart's room the next morning.

"Morning…" I chorus of voices greeted me…along with knowing looks and laughter. "Fuck…" I whispered under my breath for I knew the word of Stuart and I the previous night had spread. "Christ Stuart…you know that the entire nurses station knows about…" but my words were cut short as I entered the room and found Stuart sitting in the middle of his bed with his knees pulled into his chest. "Stuart…"

"Where the fuck have you been?" He cried out in an accusing tone as he bit at his thumb while sending evil looks my way. "You were supposed to be here early this morning and you just stroll in here when you bloody well feel like it. Go on then…get the fuck out of here. I won't be a second thought since you obviously had something better to do" With a heavy hearted sigh…I closed my eyes as I prepared myself for what I knew was going to be a bloody long and trying day. He was nasty and trite the entire time that we were together as we waited for the nurses to prep him for his surgery. I was already a nervous wreck…but with Stuart acting like such a wanker my nerves were starting to wear thin. I stood off to the sides as the nurse from the previous night injected Stuart with something that instantly took the edge off. "Vincie…" I heard him giggle loudly as he turned his head and caught sight of me. "Vincie come here" he patted the bed beside him as I gave the nurse a questioning look.

"It affects each person differently. Trust me young sir your Mr. Jones is feeling right good about now" she relied with a hearty laugh and a soft pat upon my cheek. "Go on…you got a few minutes before the attendants will be taking him to surgery" With a quick smile and another pat she left me alone with a giggling Stuart who had then found a fascination with the hand in front of his face.

"Would you look at this thing" he nearly shouted as he held his hand out for me to see. "Isn't this the ugliest thing you have ever seen…and why do they call it a hand?" his line of questioning went on and on until finally he began to calm down. "Vince…" he said in a more sedate manner as I once again took the spot next to his bed.

"Yes Stuart" I replied as I took the hand that he held out for me to take.

"I just want you to know…just in case that if I don't make it that I love you. I've always loved you and I will always love you. Just always remember that…promise me that you will"

"Stuart you don't…"

"Just promise me Vince…please" he pleaded so desperately that it nearly caused my heart to break.

"Ok Stuart…I will keep it with me forever"

"Good" he replied with a content smile as he eyes began to droop.

"Ok Mr. Jones…it's time for us to take a little trip" I heard the nurse speak from behind as she and two attendants moved to Stuart's bedside and finished prepping him. My throat was constricted with tears and outright fear as they began to roll him out of the room.

"Wait a moment…please" I cried out as I ran over towards his bedside once again. Taking his hand within my own…I leaned in and kissed him softly upon his lips. "I love you too Stuart…always have…always will" I watched as the same nurse with the playful banter from the night before dabbed at her eyes before gracing me with a smile as they continued on their journey. I watched until I could see him no more before falling into a nearby chair and falling apart once again. An hour later my mum found me sitting there in that same spot as I held onto Stuart bracelet in my hand. "Did you bring it?" I asked her as she placed her hand upon my shoulder…giving it a gentle squeeze as she did. She didn't say anything as she nodded in response before disappearing from the room…only to return with Alexander in tow a moment later…the two of them loaded down with packages. "Let's get busy"

"How you holding up love" I heard my mother speak four hours later as I sat huddled in the waiting area of the hospital. I just couldn't sit in that near empty room any longer and despite the fact that I wanted a breath of fresh air…I was afraid to leave for fear that if something went wrong they wouldn't know where to find me. "Vince…maybe you should go outside and get some air…smoke a fag…just get out of here for a bit" It was as if she were reading my thoughts…as I declined her offer before getting up off the chair I was sitting on and stretching out the kinks in my legs. "He's probably still in surgery and your not doing him or yourself any good holed up in here. Go on now…go and take a breather. I'll come and get you if needed" I wanted to turn her down once again…but decided against it as I kissed her softly upon her cheek before taking a trip to the roof.

The roof…a place that he and I had been alone together the night that he son was born. Staring over the edge…tears sliding down my face…I recalled that night and many nights before that when I was secretly in love with Stuart and he was pretending to be clueless. I smiled despite my tears at the numerous chances that he and I had to shag and yet between the two of us we always took the safe approach. I recalled the happy times that we shared…the sad times…even the times where I thought that I would never forgive him again for whatever misdeed he had played upon me. But I always did. I always forgave him no matter what…because that is what you do when you love someone so much that they are all that matters to you. I was ecstatic that he and I had finally taken a small step into the next level of our relationship…but I would be lying if I didn't say that I was petrified beyond belief as well. Everything was about to change within each of our lives and I just hoped that we were strong enough to survive it. I didn't know how long I was truly up there…but I had to admit that I felt much better after having cleared my lungs with fresh air as well as my mind. I vowed giving up cigarettes that day after Stuart's cancer scare…a vow that I would test time and time again in the oncoming months.

An hour later they brought Stuart back into his room and despite the fact that he had had major surgery…he looked as if all was well with the world. He remained unconscious for several hours after that…but the doctor had warned us ahead of time that he would be out of it most of the rest of the day. He had urged us to leave and let him get his rest…but there was no way that I was leaving his side until I saw his beautiful blue eyes look upon me and heard it from his own lips that he would be fine. My breath caught in my throat once he finally opened his eyes…staring at me as if he had no earthly idea as to who I was. I was afraid that he had forgotten everything that had happened between us and that I would have to pretend that none of it happened nor mattered to me if it had. However…all fears were laid to rest as he finally got his wits about him and reached out his hand to me.

"You told them" he spoke…his voice deep and raspy as he pulled his eyes from mine and looked over at my mother and Alexander. "Bloody hell…now everyone will know"

"You watch your tone Stuart Allen Jones…or I'll give your ears a good boxing" my mum warned playfully as he walked over and kissed him tenderly upon his cheek. "Good to see that you finally came about your senses" I heard her whisper against his ear…causing him to smile up at her in response to her words as he gave my hand a gently squeeze.

"Alex…" He nodded towards our friend as he held a handkerchief to his face…wiping at the tears blazing down his face.

"OMG…I'm just so happy and yet so sad" he cried out…tears going even faster as my mother took to him and led him out of the room.

"Fucking drama queen" Stuart chuckled slightly…before turning his gaze back to me. "You ok?" he asked…squeezing my hand once again with a look of pure concern readable across his face.

"Me…yeah…course" I replied falsely as I forced a smile across my face.

"Don't lie to me. I know you…remember" I could hear the tiredness in his voice as he patted the bed beside him as like the previous night. I didn't put up any fight for I needed to feel him…to hold him to ensure that he was truly ok. "I'm ok…" he said as if once again reading my thoughts. Oy…what the fuck is that?" he asked pointing at the small tree and decorations that were littered around the room. "It's bloody awful" he laughed…cuddling even closer to me. "Make sure to thank Alexander and your mum for me. Happy Christmas Vince…love you" he chuckled…before closing his eyes and drifting off. I had forgotten that it was Christmas and despite the fact that it was not how I had pictured our first Christmas as a couple to be…it was perfect just the same. I laid there for a while afterwards…holding Stuart in my arms as I looked at all the gaudy and bright Christmas ornaments and such. I couldn't help but smile despite their ugliness because the truth of the matter was that it was officially me and Stuart's first Christmas as a couple…and nothing could ruin that for me.

Life after that was a whirlwind of repeated trips to the doctor…bi-weekly chemotherapy treatments as well as everything else that went along with it. I dealt with constant vomiting and tiredness…upset and hissy fits and although I never showed it…it was slowly wearing me down. I was exhausted beyond anything I had ever felt before as being the constant worrier that I am…I was constantly making sure that he was comfortable and well at all times. I had moved into Stuart's loft once he had returned from hospital and we had finally become the couple that I always longed for us to be…somewhat. Don't get me wrong I loved being with Stuart…sharing a home with him…even his bed but we had yet to make love since that night at the hospital and it was extremely trying for me as I am sure that it was for Stuart as well. Actually now that I think upon it…it was probably a good thing since I was utterly knackered most of the time anyways. I truly didn't know just how exhausted I was until after the final visit to the doctor after his last round of chemotherapy. "It's good news Mr. Jones…your cancer is in remission" We left for home immediately afterwards with plans to celebrate…but my body had other ideas as I laid down on the bed for just a moment after getting home and before I knew it nearly a day and a half had passed.

When I woke up I found Stuart nowhere to be seen as I decided to take a bath and try and wake myself up fully. I was still right knackered…but felt so much better after what I thought was only a few hours of sleep. An hour later I reluctantly pulled myself out of the bath after realizing that I was completely starving. Stuart still wasn't home and I was starting to get worried as I picked up my mobile and rang him. "I'm right here" I heard him call out as he entered through the door his ringing mobile still in hand. "Good to see you're up. Feel better?" he asked with a frown upon his face as he walked over to me and kissed me upon my lips. "You had be worried for a while there…dead to the world you were. I even called the doctor to make sure that I shouldn't rush you to emergency"

"What…I was only asleep for a few hours. Why would you rush me to emergency?" I asked…confused as I grabbed one of the bags that Stuart had been carrying out of his hands and followed him to the kitchen.

"A few hours…Vince you've been sleeping for almost two days" he replied with concern as he placed his bag on the counter before turning back to me. "When we got back from the doctor that other day you said that you were tired and that you were going to catch a kip…but you didn't wake for a day and a half. I was right concerned about you…but doctor said that you were exhausted and that you just needed to sleep"

"OMG…I am so sorry Stuart" I cried out…running my hand though my hair in anguish. "You should have woke me…we were going to celebrate and…"

"Vince…you were exhausted and needed to rest…that was more important to me then celebrating. Sides…it's my fault that you were so exhausted and I should be apologizing to you" I felt his arms wrap around me as I closed my eyes and relished the feeling of his body pressed against mine.

"Stuart no…" I tried to defend him…but he cut me short as he pulled me tighter into his embrace.

"I know that I have put you through hell these last months Vince" he said with such sadness in his voice that it caused my heart to dip within my chest. I wanted to deny his words…but he truly had put me through the ringer off and on all those months…so much so most times that I actually thought about leaving him…even though I would never have done it. "I'm going to make it up to you Vince…I promise" he whispered against my ear…before nipping at it playfully. "I love you"

"I love you too" I smiled against his neck as I cuddled against it…nipping and teasing at it in hopes of literally getting a rise out of him.

"Vince…what are you doing?" he whinged playfully as I increased my ministrations.

"Nothing…" I teased…adding my hands to the sport as I slide one down the waist of his trousers…kneading his beautiful ass. "Jesus Stuart…it's been so long" I groaned as he slid his knee between my crotch his hands working round my backside as well. I didn't want to push him into anything that he wasn't ready for…but it had been almost a year since I had been made love to and I was feeling like I were going to burst at any moment. We had tried on several occasions after he had healed from his surgery and even during his chemo treatments…but he could never seem to get aroused. It was downright frustrating as he felt he were less of a man because of it and I felt that I wasn't man enough to stimulate him as well. We tried near constantly for a while there…but the anger and outbursts finally took their toll on the two of us and we eventually stopped trying any longer.

"I know Vince…" he sighed…his hands working their way under my shirt as warms hands blended across my skin. "I just don't want to make to poor of a showing again. I fucking hate that I can't fuck you right proper" I could hear the agitation in his voice and his actions confirmed it as he walked away from me. "You know…maybe you should go out tonight and find yourself a shag. Bring him home and let him fuck the shite out of you since I can't fucking do it"

"Is that what you really want me to do?" I asked…having no intention of doing such a thing…but wanting to get my point across once and for all. "Do you want me to go and find some random shag and let him have his way with me?" I went on with my questioning…growing angry as Stuart continued to stand away from me. "Do you want me to suck some mans cock…making him nice and hard before he shoves it up my ass? Is that what you fucking want?" My cries got louder as I grabbed him by the shoulder and forced him to look at me. "Is that what you want Stuart? Tell me right now and I will do it"  
"No…you are mine Vince…always mine" he grunted like a sow in season as he grabbed me roughly by my arms…crushing me to his heaving body. His mouth was demanding and forceful…but I didn't care for my words did just the trick as a hardness formed within his knickers. "Holy shit Vince…I…"

There was no time for talk as I grabbed his hand and literally dragged him into the bedroom…removing his kit before falling to my knees as if in reverence. It was massive and beautiful as it swayed teasingly before me. With no forethought I inhaled it into my mouth…closing my eyes as I savored the manly taste that I had been denied for far to long. I knew that after such a long time of being dormant that he wouldn't last long…but I didn't care cause it was as if spring had sprung or in our case dick and I was going to enjoy it for as long as I could. As expected he came quickly and loudly…his juices sliding down my throat as I licked him clean as a whistle. "Stuart…you ok?" I asked in concern as he swayed on his feet before me.

"It works…it fucking works" he cried out with a cheer as he began to jump around like some wild beast. "OMG Vince…it worked. I can't believe it. I never thought that I would be able to fuck again…but I am back and I am better then ever" he grinned madly…rushing over to me as he picked me up and spun me round the room. "Now I can fuck you good and proper and there will never be anymore talk of your shagging some other bloke…you got that Vince? How dare you doubt my ability to perform for you and…" he droned one and one…seeming to forget that he was the one that brought up the idea of my fucking some other man. It didn't matter to me though…cause Stuart was on the mend and once he was fully recovered I was going to be the one to collect the benefits.

"Let's just take it one day at a time" I laughed happily at the predatory gleam I saw in his eyes as he stalked his way towards me.

"Oh Vince…I am going to fuck you tonight and you are going to enjoy it" Who was I to deny him what he wanted to do to me as I walked away from him…slowly removing my own kit as I walked into the bed room…crawling across the bed…ass in air. "How do you want it then?" he asked timidly as he knelt behind me as if not knowing what to do.

"I want it rough and I want it now…please Stuart please" I pleaded as I reached into the cupboard and removed the necessary items. I didn't need foreplay…or even a jump start…all I wanted was for him to shove that beautiful dick so far up my ass that I would feel it for days and that just what he did. I watched over my shoulder as he slid the condom upon his cock…coating it with lube before placing his hands upon either side of my bum to steady me. "OMG…" I cried out loudly and proudly as I felt his hardness fill me to the brim. We just sat there for a moment afterwards…each with tears in our eyes at what was actually happening. "Fuck me Stuart…" I said with a smile as I grabbed onto the duvet with both hands as he began to give me a pounding that I wouldn't soon forget. He came moments later…and so did I with the help of my own hand as he fell over me completely knackered. He was asleep instantly as I cuddled within his embrace and thanked a higher power for bringing my Stuart back to me fully.

A Few Months Later…

Life after that night was wonderful and brilliant. We were shagging like mad day and night and anytime that we could in between. We were happy and more in love then I ever thought possible. I didn't think that life could get any better then that…but one the eve of Christmas he proved me completely wrong in true Stuart fashion. "Vince…" he hollered as he entered the loft early that afternoon.

"Hiya…" I called out from the living room…Christmas decorations strewn throughout our flat.

"Christ Vince…it looks like Father Christmas vomited all over the place" He laughed…rushing into the room as he wrapped his arms around me…lifted me upwards and began to spin the two of us across the room. "Lets clean this up and get dressed because I am taking you out tonight"

"Blimey…someone's happy today" I surmised as I surrendered to the many kisses that he lazed across my lips and neck. "So…what happened today…land some huge account that will make you richer then you already are?" I asked with a smile as I broke free of his grasp and began to tidy up the mess.

"I'm not telling you anything until later. Let's just say that the best thing possible is about to happen in my life and I want to share it with you" I didn't know what it possibly could be…but by the smile on his face and the look of happiness shining from his eyes I knew that it was something wonderfully important and I couldn't wait to find out.

Hours later found us at the most expensive restaurant in Manchester. I was a nervous wreck because those places always made me nervous as hell when I was forced to go to one. I never knew what to order…how to act or which piece of silverware to use with what course. Stuart however…was always at ease in those kinds of places…more refined and majestic then I would ever be. I hated being there…but I kept my gob shut for Stuart as I waited for him to announce his big news. "So are you going to tell me what the grand news is or am I going to have to guess?" I questioned…fidgeting with my tie for the hundredth time as my curiosity got the better of me.

"Dance with me" was his off topic reply as he reached his hand out across the table.

"What…no Stuart" was my hushed response as I darted my eyes around the crowded straight restaurant. "People will stare at us and…"

"Let them fucking stare…I don't care" he ground out in anger…taking my hand into his as he literally dragged me out onto the dance floor. He didn't say anything as he held me against his body as we swayed to the music surrounding us. I could tell that something was on his mind as he held me even closer…his body trembling slightly.

"Everything ok?" I asked…stepping back slightly to look into his beautiful baby blues.

"Everything is fine" he responded with a slight smile as he kissed me softly upon my lips. Pulling away from me I assumed we were done with our dance as I began to walk back to our table…only to stop as he once again took my hand into my own…turning me to face him.

"Stuart?" I asked as he stood there for a moment just looking down at me.

"You're so beautiful Vince" he began to speak in such a loving way a moment later that all I could do was stand there gaping. "You always have been…inside and out. I've been in love with you for so long before this year prior and yet never had the balls to tell you. I can tell you now…loud and clear that I love you Vince. I love you with all that I am and all the you help me to be. You've been the only one to love me for me…despite my quirks and faults and I have been racking my brain for months now trying to come up with a way to repay you for that love. It came to me days ago and I have been working like mad to get everything in order…because you deserve only the best. So I ask you this…" I watched in stunned and astute fascination as he knelt down before me on one knee…holding my hand gently within his own as he pulled a velvet box out of his pocket. "Will you Vincent Tyler do me the honor on this Christmas Eve of becoming my partner in life" With trembling hands he opened the box…reveling a pair of silver bands identical in every way.

"OMG…" I cried out like a daft man as I removed my hand from his…covering my gaping mouth with it. "Stuart…I…I don't…" I could see the blind fear within his eyes as I continued to stammer like an idiot. "Oh Jesus of course I'll be your partner. I have bloody well been waiting for this moment for longer then you can even imagine" I cried out giddily…bouncing up and down like some young lad high on sweeties. I watched as he pulled himself up off the floor…once again taking my hand into his own as he placed the band of significance upon my finger…urging me to do the same once he had done. "I love you so much Stuart Allen Jones" I cried out once I had completed my task…jumping into his arms as I wrapped my arms tightly around his neck.

Applause and well wishes echoed around us…but we barely heard them as we continued to lose ourselves within the moment. I couldn't stop looking at the shiny metal as it gleamed brightly from my ring finger…unable to fathom that what had happened was truly real. "It's not over yet Vince" I heard Stuart voice as he drew away from me…walking us back over to the table as he assisted me back into my seat. "I have another surprise for you" he chuckled with amusement…biting at his finger nervously as he reached into his pocket and pulled out a scrap of paper with a key taped to it. "I know how much you hate living at the loft" he went on…holding up his free hand when I tried to protest…because he did know just how much I hated living in the one place where his many shags continued to haunt me. "And…I hope that you don't mind but I took the liberty of finding the perfect place for us to start our life together" Once again I tried to speak…but he had other ideas as he leaned over and placed his finger across my trembling lips. "I know you Vince. I know just about everything there is to know about you. I know what you like and what you dislike. I know what you crave and what you need. I know you almost as well as I know myself and when I saw this place…I knew that it was the perfect place for us to start anew"

"OMG…" I cried out…once again covering my mouth as he slide the paper across the table at me…images of the most beautiful house I had ever seen standing out before me.

"It's got everything that we need and could ever want" He began to speak as he pointed out the important features upon the sheet. "It's even got a large garden in the front because I know how much you always wanted one growing up. It will be brilliant Vince…our own little piece of heaven. Would you like to see it Vince? Would you like to see our new home?"

"Yes…" I nodded through my tears as Stuart quickly settled up the bill. No words were spoken as we drove down the crowded streets loaded with holiday shoppers. I marveled at the perfect location once we reached it…not to far from where Stuart worked or I and even closer to my mothers. I loved it from the moment that I laid eyes upon it…because as Stuart had said earlier he knew exactly what I liked.

"Ready?" he asked as we sat outside the large home that he and I were going to share as partners in life.

"Ready" I repeated in response as together we exited the car and made our way towards our new house. With nervous fingers I used the key that I had held within my hands from the time we left the restaurant and opened the door to our new life. "Oh Stuart…it's absolutely brilliant" I sobbed…tears of the purest joy sliding down my cheeks as I took my first peek. Walking into the parlor I took in all that surrounded me as my tears increased ten fold. "When did you do all of this?" I asked…gazing at the beautiful Christmas tree before me…glittering with strings of brightly colored lights and ornaments. "Wait…Hazel and Alexander" I laughed happily…leaning back against him as he wrapped his arms around my waist from behind. It was gaudy and it was loud…but in my eyes it was the most beautiful tree I had ever seen in my lifetime.

"Yeah…" he responded with his own laughter as he turned me around in his arms…leaning his forehead against my own. "It was one year ago today that you and I became official. You…and your family of misfits took one of my darkest days and made it into something brilliant and bright. I know that I never told you…but seeing that ugly Christmas tree and you and Hazel and Alex…well it meant more to me then anything else in the world. I never felt more loved in my entire life then I did at that moment and I wanted you to feel what I felt that day as well"

"I love you…I love you so much" I replied with such love within my heart that I just knew that it was going to burst. "I do…I do feel it. I feel it every day Stuart. I feel it when you kiss me…when you hold me…even when you quarrel with me. I feel it right now at this very moment as you hold me and stare into my eyes. You make me so happy…so very happy. Happy Christmas Stuart "

"Happy Christmas Vince. I love you too"

The End


End file.
